What to say when negotiating severance

Almost every severance offer is the first offer, not the final one. Companies expect a small number of people to push back, and the ones who do — politely, specifically, in writing — often get something. Not always more weeks. Sometimes COBRA paid, sometimes the non-disparagement softened, sometimes an additional month of equity vesting. Asking does not insult the company. The HR person on the other side has a script for it. The rule is: ask once, in writing, with three specific items. Then have one phone call if they want to talk. Do not negotiate against yourself by sending a second email.

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The counter-offer email

Send within three to five days of receiving the offer. To the HR contact who sent it. "Subject: Severance package — a few questions before I sign Hi [Name], Thank you for sending the package on [date], and for the time on the call. I appreciate the care that went into it. Before I sign, I wanted to flag three items and ask whether the company has flexibility on them. 1. Severance weeks. The current offer is [eight weeks]. Given my [four years] of tenure and the timing of the layoff — [mid-Q4 / right before the holiday hiring freeze / two weeks before my equity cliff] — I would like to ask for [twelve weeks]. That is what would give me realistic runway to find a comparable role in this market. 2. COBRA. The package covers insurance through [date]. Would the company be open to covering COBRA premiums for [three additional months] beyond that? I have a family of [four] and the gap is the single biggest risk in my plan. 3. Non-disparagement and references. I am comfortable with a standard mutual non-disparagement. I would like to confirm that nothing in the agreement prevents [my manager / former colleagues] from giving honest references on request. Could you point me to the language that covers that? I am not trying to drag this out — I would like to sign within the original window. If any of these is a yes, please send the revised language and I will turn it around within forty-eight hours. Thank you, [Your name]"

Why this works: opens with a thank-you, not an apology, which keeps the tone professional
Why this works: three specific asks, each with a reason — easy for HR to take to a manager
Why this works: names the deadline as something you intend to meet, not something to push against
Why this works: 'is the company open to' is softer than 'I am demanding' but just as clear
Why this works: requests a paper trail on references, which most people forget to ask for

The phone script — if HR calls instead of replying in writing

Sometimes HR will respond with a phone call to talk it through rather than emailing a counter. That is usually a good sign. Have this in front of you. "Thanks for calling. I'll keep it short. The three items in my email are the ones that matter most to me — the weeks, COBRA, and the reference language. Of those, the most important one is [the weeks / COBRA / the language], because [one-sentence reason]. If the company can move on [the most important one], I am ready to sign by [date]. If not, I would still like to know whether the other two are open. I am not asking for everything — I am asking for the one thing that changes the math. What is possible from your side?" Then stop talking. Let them respond. Do not fill silence.

Variations

Stronger version, if you are senior, had a recent strong review, or were a flight risk they retained: "Before I sign, I wanted to ask the company to consider [sixteen weeks] of severance and a [three-month] extension of equity vesting. I led [specific function] through [specific outcome] this year, and the package as written does not reflect the timing — I would have been at the [twelve-month / two-year] vesting milestone within [N weeks]. I'd like to find a number we can both sign on." Lighter version, if you are early in tenure or the company is in real trouble: "I appreciate the offer. The one item I'd like to ask about is COBRA. Would the company be open to covering premiums for [two additional months] beyond [date]? That is the part of the package that would most directly help." If the deadline is too short: "Thanks for the offer. The one ask I have before I sign is for [seven additional days] on the review window — I'd like to have a brief call with an attorney about the non-compete language. I'm not trying to drag this out, and I plan to sign within the extended window."

What not to say

Lines that turn a winnable negotiation into a closed door.

'This is insulting' — kills the relationship and almost never moves the number
'I have an offer from another company' if you do not — bluffing about a competing offer gets caught and is unrecoverable
'I'll sue' on the first email — if you have a real legal claim, hire a lawyer instead of threatening one
More than three asks in one email — anything past three reads as a wish list
Apologising for asking — HR is not offended by counter-offers, they are budgeted for them

Before you sign

Two things to do before signing anything, even an improved package. One, read every clause about non-compete, non-solicit, and confidentiality — these can quietly shrink your job market for a year. Two, ask a lawyer for fifteen minutes if anything looks unusual. Most employment lawyers will do a quick read for $200 to $400, and some will do an initial call for free. It is the cheapest insurance you will buy this year. CareerCanopy is not a law firm and this is not legal advice. If something looks off, it is worth a call to someone who can give you advice that applies to your specific situation.

Questions

Common questions

Should I negotiate severance after a layoff?

Yes, in most cases. Companies expect a small number of people to push back, and the ones who do — calmly, in writing, with three specific asks — often get something. Even when the weeks number does not move, COBRA coverage, reference language, or the review window often does.

What can I ask for in a severance negotiation?

Most commonly: more weeks of severance, additional COBRA coverage, an extended review window, softer non-compete or non-disparagement language, and confirmation that former managers can give honest references. Senior roles sometimes also negotiate extended equity vesting or a continued bonus payout. Pick the three that matter most to your situation and ask for those.

How long do I have to sign a severance agreement?

Most US severance offers come with a seven to twenty-one day review window — and for employees over forty, federal law requires a minimum of twenty-one days under the OWBPA, plus a seven-day revocation period after signing. If the deadline is shorter than that and you are over forty, that is a flag worth a quick call to an employment attorney before you sign.

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